Navigating Easter During Eating Disorder Recovery
Easter is just around the corner, already!
While many people enjoy the long weekend, Easter can be a difficult time for people recovering from an eating disorder. Easter can encourage us to continue working our way through recovery, while also presenting us with experiences which can cause stress and anxiety for many reasons.
In this blog post, we’ll look at the different factors which can shape our experience of Easter and share strategies on how to navigate the season during recovery.
What makes Easter challenging for someone recovering from an eating disorder?
1. Breaking routine
For some people, the Easter long weekend itself can cause stress. While many enjoy having public holidays, some find themselves feeling anxious when their usual daily structure is changed. This may be particularly pertinent for people recovering from an eating disorder, who may follow an eating pattern based on their work or study routine and find it difficult to make food choices on weekends and public holidays. In this instance, having a long weekend can make you feel more sensitive than usual, making challenges around Easter all the more difficult to navigate. However, this can also be beneficial. Being exposed to changes in routine asks us to be flexible and adaptable, and to use the skills we have learned throughout recovery.
2. Challenging food rules
Easter is also a time to celebrate food, encouraging us to connect with one another through chocolate, hot cross buns, hot cocoa, and other food rituals. Eating these foods more often and in larger portions than usual over Easter is normal, and every individual has permission to enjoy this part of the holiday. For many people, this often involves challenging food rules. These rules may relate to the types of food eaten, time of day, or amount eaten. While it is understandable that this experience can cause anxiety, it also presents us with an opportunity to notice, question and challenge these ‘rules’. Food rules often provide us with a quick way of making decisions without having to think about it, so questioning a rule is one of the first things we can do to disempower it.
Other ways in which food rules exist in society include diet culture. Diet culture describes the widespread use of food and eating behaviours within society to change our bodies. This includes not only dieting, but also marketing, social media, and society’s attitudes towards food (for more information, see our blog post on dance culture, diet culture, and creating recovery culture here).
One of the characteristic features of diet culture is double standards. While a food may be acceptable in one context, it may not be in another. For example, eating chocolate in the form of sugar-free dairy-free low-calorie cocoa nibs may be normalised across social media platforms, but eating a Snickers bar is not. Vegan hot chocolate made on a stove top is accepted, but not microwaved Ovaltine or Milo. Homemade hot cross buns, but not store bought – the list goes on. These are often driven by diet trends and elitism, and simply do not reflect real life. And while often subliminal, double standards are harmful because they teach us that one way of eating is okay and the other not-okay. This dichotomous thinking leads us to create food rules, and distracts us from eating in a way which aligns with our values.
3. Eating socially
Easter is also a social occasion, both within our direct social groups and within our broader culture. Engaging in cultural traditional such as Easter foods can provide a strong sense of social connection and shared experience, whether we are alone enjoying some chocolate on Good Friday evening or enjoying a warm hot cross bun with a friend on Easter Sunday morning. This can be particularly meaningful for people recovering from an eating disorder, who may have been excluded from these rituals in the past. It also asks us to eat based on our values of social connection rather than the eating disorder, helping us build strength against it.
Eating socially also provides opportunity to practice intuitive eating. While the term intuitive eating is commonly used to describe eating based on the bodies internal cues, it also includes having the flexibility to eat based on social cues; for example, choosing to eat an Easter egg which a friend serves you with your coffee, even if you are not hungry or craving it at the time. By sensing the opportunity for connection through food and responding to this, we are using our intuition. This is an important skill which we can practice during events such as Easter.
However, it is also important to acknowledge that the social aspect of Easter can also cause of distress. Some people may find it challenging eating socially due to fear of being judged by others, not having control over the type and amount of food provided, or eating in an unfamiliar environment. Other may find social events and family gathering overwhelming, particularly following the recent lockdown. The long weekend can also be filled with comments about food and body shape, further heightening anxiety. These experiences can often cause anxiety, and make it difficult to navigate the Easter period.
Reflecting on recovery
Easter can be a poignant time for individuals who are in the process of recovery. On one hand, it provides an opportunity to reflect on our progress and accomplishments. It also prompts use to make decisions which the eating disorder may have previously made for us, and for many people holidays such as Easter – while challenging – can be empowering.
On the other hand, this Easter may be difficult for people who have been unable to engage in the holiday in previous years. This can cause friends and family members to feel uncertain about how to approach Easter, or to have expectations of you that may not longer be relevant. For example, a family member may not be aware that you are ready to eat Easter foods and so may not include you in certain rituals. While this can create discomfort, it is important to acknowledge that misunderstandings happen, and use clear communication to resolve tension or uncertainty.
Strategies to navigate Easter
If you feel that any of the abovementioned topics may make this Easter challenging for you, we have developed some strategies to help navigate the long weekend:
Decision and Goal Setting
Before Easter, make a purposeful decision that you are going to eat types or amounts of foods which are different for you, and accept this. You may also wish to share to write this down or share it with a loved one to help give to the strength the honour your decision.
Choose how you would like to approach Easter. For example, would you like eat intuitively, or decide ahead of time how much chocolate or how many hot cross buns you would like to eat? Choose an approach that will make the long weekend the least stressful for you, and this will vary from person to person. By deciding ahead of time, we can decrease uncertainty at meal times and provide ourselves with permission to eat.
Task-sharing and Roles of Each Person
Some people may find that not being in charge of which foods are bought, how they are stored and when they are eaten may lessen the burden of decision making over Easter. This can allow you to just focus on eating and enjoying.
Distractions, Social Media, and Boundaries
Use distraction techniques if you are feeling distressed after eating Easter foods. Activities which require attention or involve your other senses are often helpful, such as having a bath or shower, calling a friend, or playing a boardgame.
If you are feeling distressed before, during or after eating, use a helicopter view. By zooming up and away from your situation, you can see the bigger picture. This includes seeing things that important to you, such as social connection, relationships, and recovery.
If you are planning a social event, including some non-eating related activities may help you connect to the other enjoyable parts of Easter. Examples include holding an Easter egg hunt, helping children make Easter hats for school parades, and painting boiled eggs.
It may be helpful to tune out from social media and diet culture over the long weekend, particularly if you are challenging food rules.
Know what your boundaries are when it comes to discussing food, body shape, and/or eating disorders. If you do not want to engage in this type of conversation with your loved ones, you have permission to tell them this and maintain your boundaries.
Your Friends, Family, and Team’s Got Your Back
At the same time, know that you do not have to take on Easter alone. Talking to a friend, partner, family member, or your dietitian about any anxieties over the Easter period can help you approach challenges with support from your team.
You may find it helpful to develop a shared code-word or gesture with a loved one, which you can use in social settings if you are feeling overwhelmed. This can allow you to notify your support person without drawing attention to your distress.
Share your accomplishments with those around you. No victory is too little to be celebrate.
If you are having difficulty coping over Easter and need someone to speak to, you can also call Lifeline (13 11 14) or The Butterfly Foundation (1800 33 4673).
Wishing you a safe and happy Easter from the DDD Centre for Recovery team!
